Friday, December 29, 2006

New Years

I'm off to a city called Cheongju for New Years, leave tomorrow. It used to be the capital of Korea way back in the day and as such apparently has heaps of cool shit there, that was until the invading Mongols sacked it, and a few centuries later the Jappers got it, now it has apparently all been restored. It's pretty close to Gimhae, just an hour an a half on the bus.

I want everyone to have a Happy New Year's, for you all to get pissed and have a hang over free New Years day.... yeah right!

I'll try to light a fire for you all. Sez, the job in New Zealand as resident pyro is now yours.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Lost in Busan (and in Translation)

On the 24th I made my first trip out of this city, I went to Busan which is about an hour away by bus. It is the second biggest city in Korea. It was huge, apart from the B.D.O it was the only time I have ever been amongst wall to wall people. I thought I was getting a bus to downtown Busan but I obviously got on the wrong one as after more than an hour the driver started glaring at me, nodding in my direction to the other passengers and generally giving me the creeps so I figured I could be a dorky tourist with my guide book and try to work it out with an irate bus driver or jump off. I saw a Lotteria coming up and as I had had no brecky I choose the latter option. Lotteria is the Korean version of Mickey D's and Burger King. I had an Octopus burger with a shake and fries. I don't recommend it, or the shake but the fries were sweet as.

So there I was, trying to hold down a processed 'pus burger with a chocolate milkshake, in a city of 4 million and only two smokes left in my pocket. The night before, I had been watching the Discovery channel and an ad came on that said "Don't look back, one foot forward and if lost take a breath and start again" so I did. I decided to just walk, it was only 10am, I had all day so I sparked up a ciggie and walked till I came across the subway station. My bible, The Lonely Planet Korean version and it's supplement the L.P Korean phrase book (Thanks Mum) had a subway map in it so I checked it out and decided to first go to ㅐㅜ초대ㅝ뭏 (Oncheonjang) where there was reputedly the largest spa in Asia there. That was really the whole point of me travelling to Busan. I had never been on a subway before but I figured it was only an underground train so it couldn't be too hard to work out. 45 minutes later I had sorted out the change machine, the ticket machine, worked out what line to head for and which stations to transfer subs (Can I call them that?) held my breath and jumped on. I was expecting a dirty filthy carriage like I see on american films with a black guy with a knife down his undies ready to yell out "Gimme all ya money" what I got was a pristine, immaculately clean brand spanking new ride. I was well impressed with it and the fact that I worked it all out with out using my bible or asking for help, which doesn't really work any way as they all say yes to every question made it all good.

When I actually got to Heosimcheong I was not only disappointed, I was fucked off. I made an effort to go some where and it turned it to be a bigger version of John Beaumont's pool. He taught me how how to swim, GOOD GUY, and this so called largest Spa in Asia was just a big N.Z heated pool. It even had the disgusting chlorine smell.

I was flabbergasted, I was thinking like a Kiwi, that I would be going to an outdoor hot pool, that I could soak myself in with what was normally considered a HOT pool, hot natural water... I was wrong. Oh well whatever, nervermind.

The Christmas that never was.

Today is boxing day and I've just finished work, over here they all take a day off for Xmas (by that I mean no school but everything else is open) but it is not in the middle of their Summer holidays like I'm used to. This is not a Christian country, though the missionaries made a good show of it( is that Cricket?), it could be called a Buddhist country but I've been reading up on Korea to find shit to do and places to go and all the books tell me that they don't really believe in anything, most are Atheists. But despite this everyone follows Confucius, which is not a religion but a train of thought, I think, so like all people they have got a set of rules, like don't slit throats or fuck ya mates girl or take a piss when it's your round. They just don't really care a lot. Which is fine by me.

They have bus drivers and the dudes in the middle of the street directing traffic wearing the red Father Christmas suit but not the raging commercial bollocks that plagues the world. And one thing I loved about Christmas in a non christian country.... no bloody Christmas carols, I did hear a Korean version of jingle bells twice and a few others... but generally no.

So I woke up on Christmas day with a phone call from Dad (The best), had a coffee, rung the rest of my folks all before 10am, time differences meant they were all half cut by then so I decided to have a drink as well. Soju for breakfast while watching the English movie channel, I got to see the last of the LOTR's, followed by a wee Christmas stroll to check out the Christmas tree in the Gimhae Sports and Arts centre, There I had my photo taken with a Korean family who also happened to be checking out the tree. I'm not entirely sure how that happened but I don't care. then off to the pub, my new local called Beer and Girls. There I got wished a Merry Christmas by a hot chick who spoke a little English. One of the best things about this place is being able to smoke inside the pub, so I'm making full use of it. I was drinking a German beer called Lowen Brau, and when that ran out I went home to bed.

So not much of a Christmas but a pretty cool day all the same, half boozed by lunch time, fully boozed by bed time and I don't remember doing anything stupid, like last Christmas.

P.S Merry Christmas to Everyone at home and my mates who aren't at home.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

O.B Blue.

I've just finished work and feel like going home but now I have to decorate my classroom for the Festive Season, what a load of Bollocks, so I'll make an effort just so that my class isn't the only dumb one. Not sure what I'm gonna do.

I got this adult class who basically just want conversational English so we just talk about things, last week they wanted to hear about this American SitCom, so I work out that they were talking about Friends so I went out and found a D.V.D and tonight I showed them it. I can't believe that it was not on Korean T.V, maybe it was only on Cable.

Last Sat I was walking along minding my own business when this fulla shouts out to me, I turn around and to my surprise I was looking at a white guy, we get talking and he said that on Friday nights all the foreign Teachers head out to this pub called Beer and Girls. That sounds like a good place to get drunk in so tomorrow that's were I'm heading, to get pissed with strangers who I wont have to speak slowly with. I've finally discovered a Korean beer that I like, it's called O.B blue and tastes a little like Lion Ice.

I'm planning a trip to Busan this weekend to check out the largest and hottest Spa in Asia, I'm gonna have a hell of a mission getting there, involving Buses, Trains and the Subway but it will be my first attempt at finding my way around in a place where only the children can speak English. leave early to avoid the traffic jams is what I was told. My students here can't get over the fact that traffic jams, subways and crowds are not part of vocabulary, but I guess I'm gonna have to get used to them in huge hurry.

Bugger decorating my class, I'm going home via the fulla that sells beer on the street and the old lady who makes good cheap food.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Gimhae

It's Monday, I have sucessfully survived my first full week in Korea. I have now met all my students the vast majority of them are extremely keen to learn, I think maybe they all are but last week some didn't want to be in my classroom. Hopefully this is down to the fact that my classes are late at night and they have been up all day at their Primary schools, followed by all their sport and exta cirriculumn stuff and then have to go to a private school for extra English language classes.

The T.V programmes over here are hilarious, I can't follow any of them, they got a channel that is solely for Playstation games where people play each other on national television and the game is broadcast! They have got lots of Korean slapstick comedy that even though I can't understand it still makes me laugh. There are three English channels where I have the absolute honour of watching reruns of MacGeyver and The A-Team! plus Discovery which is very cool.

I spent yesterday walking around the city, I found this huge outdoor market that sells everything from a live octopus to socks to bread to electric blankets, it really is amazing what I found there. I spent hours walking around but in the late afternoon it started snowing so I decided to walk home, not knowing that I was over an hour from home and was bloody cold when I got back! That was the first time I have ever been in snowing snow!

I"m not too happy with those Sri Lankan Cricketers, did we really lose on the last ball of the last day? or am I a little lost in the translation?

Monday, December 11, 2006

South Korea.

I arrived in Korea late on Thursday night, I had been in a plane for a long time and was eager to get out, only to find massive delays at Incheon (Seoul) Airport. I was pretty lucky to be bumped up to business class for my long haul flight from Sydney to Incheon. It was awesome, I ate some dam good food, drank plenty of red wine and port ( The beer was crap so I moved on) had a chair that was fully move able by a little remote control that adjusted in about 9 ways, had my own little t.v screen and hostesses answering my every whim! I got bumped up cause my economy seat was double booked and the Korean woman who also had that seat started screaming at me in Korean and the hostess lead me away to the front of the plane, much to this other woman's disgust.

I finally got to Busan where the Director of the school picked me up and took me to a hotel for the night. She told me she would pick me up at 10 the next morning. That morning was the first time I saw Korea in the day light and the first thing I saw reminded me of the Thames Tarts. I got out of the hotel and the first thing I saw was an eel wriggling down the street. I couldn't believe it, I was in an urban environment full of cars and people and this bloody eel, so I investigated. Around the corner was a shop which sold live fish to reataurants and the eel had obviouslt escaped from there.

I've got a pokey little flat which has my bedroom also as the living room, a bathroom with the works in it and a kitchen which is also the laundry, I'm on the 2nd floor of a 4 story apartment building with 4 flats on each floor. I think I'm pretty luck cause all around me are massive apartments housing thousands of people. It's fully furnished with a double bed, fridge/freezer, gas elements, pots, pans, cups etc underfloor heating the whole lot. The only thing I had to get was bedding and a plug for the sink.

My job is a 10 minute walk from my flat, I've had my first classes and it was just as I expected. I got another class in 10 minutes so gotta fly.

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Pick 6 Hawkes Bay Jockey Club

I'm in a hurry, got work shortly, here's my picks:

Leg One: 3. Giovanni
Leg Two: 3. Cedar Manor
4. Art Link
Leg Three: 8. Samurai
Leg Four: 8. Darci Brahma
13. Legs
Leg Five: 2. Endearing
Leg Six: 1. Happy Harry
11. Kay's Awake.

Gotta go and pour pints.

Friday, September 01, 2006

...No he ain't gonna die

After a drought so terrible that the rising salt levels in the Australian desert pales into significance (if in doubt as to what that means ask a Geographer) I am back into this blog writing malarky. The reason this event has taking place is basically that I remembered what my pass word was and can now get back into the thing.

I got a bit of news for everyone, in keeping with my goal of going to live in some little Irish Village I am about to sign a contract to go teaching in South Korea, as soon as the little people over there fork out the cash for my ticket. I have not yet got any idea where I will be going, as long as it is in the South and not the North I'm really too worried cause A. I have only heard of Seoul, B. What difference will it make to a kiwi who can't speak Korean, C. They all look alike so I can transfer that knowledge to all places looking alike and D. I don't care as long as it is out of New Zealand.

They are giving me a sweet deal, return airfares, pay half of my medical insurance, free accomodation for a year, a salary much higher than I got when teaching in New Zealand and make me a millionaire (in Korean money any way) And apparently only a 5% tax rate, but I don't believe that one.

Any one got tips about being a laid back Ginga Rooster in an Asian country? Like where can you get a decent beer? Where the best place to get kicked out of concerts is? And I'm 5 foot 10, will this make me a towering giant with red hair or just another alcoholic school teacher?

I've been watching reruns of M*A*S*H 4077th as research, it's on at half 11 on T.V 3 week days, it's great working in a bar where you don't start work early like every one else. And I get free pints of Lager.

Big Pick 6 this weekend at Hastings, if in doubt anchor everything with Darci Brahma and pick the rest through drunken eyes, I'll come up with my picks later on, I challenge Jimmy Jangles to a bet.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Cha Ching

I just got an email from the Commision, they want my bank statements from the last 3 months. Fuck. Reckon they understand what an over draft is?

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Angst

I'm starting to get angsty, I wanna go cruise the world and the bloody British High Commission is fucking around and taking their time to give me a visa. I reckon I'll be outta here in four weeks tops, which means I'm gonna hitch on down to Welly and knock on the door of the Commission and ask whats up and explain to them that they need me to enhance their sporting stock as I qualify for an Irish passport and I am thinking of taking up rugby as I feel I have an even chance of making the British and Irish Lions squad for their next tour.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

New Years.

Today is New Years Day, I can honestly say that I havn't had a beer all year, the Guinness in the wee small hours don't count. I had a pretty quiet time, Six of us sat around home drinking, slowly but assuredly getting drunk. I was mixing my drinks but keep an eye on myself as I definitely did not want a repeat of myBoxing Day hang over. After the lamest countdown since Europe we had a few more beers then went into little ole Havelock North. I led everyone straight to The Rose and Shamrock where there was a half decent covers band playing good sing a long songs, the whole night was pretty uneventful, but thats the way it goes sometimes.

Today I did the time honoured Ryan tradition of going to the races. The place was packed with hung over people. I was one. I gambled away all my savings. It was probably just as well that I didn't feel like drinking as I got breath tested on the way out, I'm watching a movie called Garden State. It's got that dude from Scrubs in it. It has a few moments but.....