Sharks

In 3 weekends I am going to be feeding these sharks in the Shark Tank of the Busan Aquarium. It's gonna be sweet, aye Mark!

http://www.scubainkorea.com/Shark_Diving/Live_Cam_Pop_Up/Live_Cam.htm

They got a live web cam set up, it looks awesome.

Trim and Proper

Last night I was drinking at the local and I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I got a bit of a shock as it made me realise that I havn't had a hair cut in almost 4 months, I had finished work so was wearing some nice clothes etc and I saw this mop of flowing Ginga locks shooting off to mate with Medusa. It did not look right so this morning I ventured into a hair dressers and popped my Korean hair cut cherry. Bugger me, did they do a good job. I was worried what was going to happen as I don't have enough Korean to explain how I wanted my hair to look and the hair dresser had no English. I just sat there, smiled, pretended my hands were scissors, ran them through my hair , she smiled and nodded and then proceeded to give me the works. I got my hair washed, a head and shoulders massage, a cut, a further shampoo and a smile goodbye all for less than 5 Kiwi bucks.

Think I might go back next week..

Food in Seoul

I forgot to mention earlier the weird food I had on the weekend. The first was a can of drink that I got out of a vending machine, it was bloody cold boiled rice in a can! Tasted just like it sounds.
The second was at a restaurant called Bennington's, it's a western style place. We went there because it was close to the train station and we needed to eat in a hurry as we were running a little late. I had had a serious binge weekend and wasn't feeling up to eating much so I thought I would play it safe and order a sandwich. I asked for a Turkey and Ham, what I got is criminal. It was a Turkey and Ham sandwich all right but it had been battered and then deep fried. With icing sugar on top! I nearly vomited, one bite was all I could take. It gets worse, I got a bowl of fries on the side, fair enough I thought. It came with a red dipping sauce. I was thinking so far so good, until I tasted the shit. It was bloody raspberry jam.

Seoul Part II

On Sunday night I had a steak at T.G.I.F (That's an Aussie Style restaurant chain called Thank God it's Friday) It sure was good to eat some Steak and Chips! We found ourselves in this bar called Rough, when we walked in the place was empty and playing Hip Hop, it didn't take long to change the music over to rock, especially when they realised how much we were spending! They were downloading songs for us. It was most likely the first time Kenny Rodgers, Gambler had been heard in these parts! After about an hour there the place started to fill up and the bar tenders put on a cocktail show for us, bottles were thrown everywhere, flaming bottles juggled, a sculling competition between one of us, an Irish chick and a Korean bird. (The Korean never stood a chance!) breathing fire, the works. Of course numerous cocktails went down. I'm not a big fan of these but I have heard alot of there names before without actually trying them so I was right in to the Manhattans, Kamikazes, Margaritas, Cosmopolitans, Wall Bangers and Mai Tai's.

I didn't get up to any of the tourist shit, I'm saving that for next time which won't be too far away...

In April there is a horse race in Japan, the world's richest Steeple and No Hero from Hastings has been accepted so I gotta sort out how to get myself there.

Seoul.

I survived my weekend in Seoul, but only just! We all got there about 3pm on Saturday and headed straight for our backpackers. We foolishly decided to take the Subway for the first part of the journey there. I thought the Busan Subway was huge, well, Seoul's is massive. We spent about an hour wandering around, trying to find the right lines, then the right levels and then the right directions. It was a little piece of chaos that left us surprisingly in good spirits. After we got off the Subway we took a taxi the rest of the way, there were too many of us for one taxi so had to get two. You can imagine me jumping in to the second taxi and yelling "Follow that Cab!" to a driver who can't speak English! We got dropped off at the wrong backpackers, shit happens, but we managed to get the lady to ring up our backpackers and asked them to come and pick us up. We got picked up all right, 7 of us got picked up by a dude on a bicycle!.W.T.F!

After drinking for a few hours at the nearest pub we could find we headed off in the general direction of Hongik University. (It's the same the world over, head to a university and you will find beer) after bar hopping for a while we all started getting a wee bit drunk and one of us was in no position to carry on (Bloody Aussies!) We had our doubts if she could even find her way back to the Hostel so myself and another decided to take her home ourselves, when we got back to the area to find our mates I spotted a bon fire. Now I love a good fire and to to see a group of Koreans sitting around a fire in the middle of this massive urban environment, drinking beers and playing guitars I just had to go over. I was expecting them to not speak English, but they did! I was in Heaven, a quick stop to the dairy across the way to buy some beer ensured that I got a turn on the guitar! Every so often someone would get up to find some more wood, it really is amazing the shit that was just on the street in Seoul! There was a Korean dude who could play and sing like Thom Yorke! he pulled out Radiohead after Radiohead. Before I knew it the place was crawling with foreigners, I met a chick from Napier! I must have stayed there for at least three hours playing as many New Zealand songs as I could and am proud to say my rendition of Teen Spirit got the crowd moshing! After we left there around 5ish we attempted to get back to the Hostel. We could not for the life of us find the dam place! We managed to get back to the right suburb, but had no luck finding it so checked into another motel, paid through the nose for it but the next afternoon when we woke up we realised how flash it really was, it had the net, a spa bath and so much free stuff I didn't have enough pockets, a huge T.V that had this curious little box beside it. On further investigation I saw that it had a picture of a naked lady on it and a slot to put in 1000wan bills. (Thats about a Kiwi dollar) so I duly paid my dollar and was rewarded with 20 minutes of Korean Porn. I was in Hysterics.

More coming later, I'm too hungry to write.

Can't wait...

Super fast train tickets booked
Super cheap accommodation booked
Got paid this morning
Look out Seoul, the Rooster is about to crow...

Spring is here.

Last night it started raining, I have been here for two months and it has only rained three times but last night we had some proper rain. Over here the warmer weather signifies rain, usually when the sun goes down and the temperature drops a little. Warmer air can hold more moisture than cooler air and as it's humid during the day when the sun goes down that moisture just drops outta the sky. One good thing about it is that this morning everything was clean, no air pollution settling everywhere and the manky smell has some what disappeared, I'm sure it will be back.

Yesterday I experienced my first piece of Korean racism towards me, I was trying to become a member of the Korean Train Network so I can get cheaper fares. I was told that because I wasn't a Korean with Korean identification that it wasn't allowed, so I pulled out my Korean government issued Foreign Alien Registration card and it was hinted that I still wasn't Korean and they couldn't help me. Fuckers I want that discount.

I'm Early.

Last night I went to bed at midnight, by 4am I was still fighting the sleep so I got up and cleaned my flat, then watched a movie and now It is nearly 9am and I have found myself at work. This may sound normal but I don't usually start work until 3pm and what is even weirder is that today is my easy day and I don't start work till a quarter past four. So why am I here? Cause I was bored at home and thought I should come into work and see what's interesting.

One thing I did find out is never ever again walk past the public school around the corner (Uam Elementary) at half Eight in the morning, I know they learn English over here but I can't take 50 "Hello, how are you, where are you from, America?" in a row from these bloody smiling little school kids. Why can't they be like Kiwi school kids and not smile on the way to school?

Today was also the first time that I unlocked the door to my school, Cause I'm the last to leave every night I have locked it on numerous occasions and setting the alarm is a piece of cake, but not disarming it! I got a screaming automatic voice in Korean saying do something, I had to remember back to my first day when I was told what to do by my boss who speaks very little English. Bloody nightmare, I hope it's off and I haven't tripped some kind of silent alarm as there is no way my Korean is good enough to explain the situation to a security guard.

I suppose I could write up next weeks lesson plans, or clean my classroom but a coffee and smoke followed by checking out Bebo sounds much better.

I get paid again this week, more millions of dosh coming my way, I couldn't even spend the last lot of millions I got and by the grace of Tangaroa I tried. Jangles, you must be pissed that I earnt a cool mill before you did!

Go drink at the Cat.

I just heard that Rosie's down the road from the Cat has gone out of business cause it's shit. The only good thing about it was the Bulmers Cider. Go and drink at the Cat and Fiddle, they will look after you.

He aint gonna die

I've known this dude from America for about a month, last night was his leaving party, he's going back home for a while then off to teach in The Czech Republic but the real reason that I am writing about him is because last night I discovered that he is from a small town in Seattle called Olympia, the next small down down the road is a place called Aberdeen. Any one got my drift yet? He was a uni student during the beginning of the Grunge Explosion, we spent all night talking about bands he has seen and gigs he bled at and of course the musicians that he knew cause he was from the same town, went to school with, drunk with, and boiled up mushrooms with. I was in awe of this guy as story after story popped out. He saw all the Bands, NIRVANA, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, L7, Mudhoney, The Melvins, Stone Temple Pilots. He told me two stories about God, the first time he met this stooped over skinny guy in op shop clothes was in a bar and they got to talking about nothing in particular and ended up playing pool together. Those of you that know me can imagine how I was sitting right on the edge of my seat, drooling at the thought of playing Pool with Kurt Cobain. The short quiet skinny guy won the game!

The other story was how he and a friend were in a convience store and in walks Cobain and Courtney Love. She walks up to the two of them and asks his mate to approach Kurt and say "Hey, your Eddie Vedder I love Pearl Jam and I'm your biggest fan!" She offers him $5 to do this. He thought about it and reasoned this is my chance to talk to Cobain, even if I am fucking with him. So he did. Love was pissing herself with laughter and Cobain walked out without saying a word.

The Weekend.

I spent all day Saturday at the University in Jinju on a teachers refresher course for the chain of Schools that I work for (E.Bo Young Talking Club). The first half of the day we were in a room full of computers, it was my dumb luck to get a computer that didn't work! And to top it all off the entire morning course was in Korean! What a waste of time it was for me. The afternoon session was a little better. It was all about running lessons and how to keep the class interested. The chick up on stage kept asking me questions in front of everyone, talk about being put on the spot but I successfully answered all the questions and each time got applauded for it! I should have worn a hat so my locks wouldn't have stuck out so much then maybe I wouldn't have been asked so many questions. There were only a few other foreigners on the course and I got talking to them all and so have met some new guys.

After the course I had arranged to meet up with some Irish people in Jinju, we went bowling, then drinking. I met Scotty from Scotland in a bar called Gurl. I have never met such a drunk person in my life! He was fucked, I managed to find out that he had been drinking for 2 days, got talking to him and ended up drinking a bottle of Johnnie Black with him. He paid! He was pretty interesting, got into trouble back home and was kind of hiding out in Korea! He wouldn't tell me what he did and with the amount of tattoos on his body I wasn't gonna ask to much about it! The first thing he said to me was "I'm a Celtic supporter, are we ganna fight?" Luckily I knew that Celtic supporters are Catholic so we got to talking about it, Scotland has such a different sporting culture from New Zealand, he was saying if your team lost you had to fight the opposition supporters for redemption. I can't believe how drunk he was. He kept on telling me how good it was to talk to someone who could understand his thick Scottish accent!

I went out last night to a Italian restaurant, had the best pepperoni pizza I had ever tasted in my life followed by a few quiet pints at the local then off to bed.

I got my second New Years of the year in two weeks time. These Koreans don't fuck about they take 3 days off to celebrate it! I'm planning a trip to Seoul, I don't want to waste these 3 days by staying in Gimhae and it seems like a good idea to travel further afield. Big Smoke, here I come.

Who the hell does that English Wanker Wilkinson think he is? Him and his fucken drop goals, fuck off to League.

This Weekend...

Tomorrow I am going to Jinju University with all the teachers from my school on some sort of course to learn about some sort of new English test, normally I would be keen as mustard for something like that but it's an early start (leave at 7) and after all today is Friday which means tonight is Friday night which means a quiet one for me. Normally in a situation like this I would go straight home but as I left my cell phone at the pub on Wednesday I gotta turn up to get it and since I will be there....

Life has been pretty quiet this week, I went out on Wed but that was it, been catching up on some much needed rest, it's been so quiet I'm gonna sort out a hell of a Saturday night. Any one keen?

Bad day in Gimhae.

The air pollution in this place is starting to get to me, that along with spending all day talking and participating in all night kareoke benders has reduced my throat to mince meat. The plus side is my voice sounds more like a grunge God but fuck I gotta cut back on the ciggies. Those little bastards are so cheap over here it is not funny. And I can't get rollies anywhere. The water is just as bad, no tap water for me, bottled all the way. You can get 1500mls for about 90c Kiwi. Having rice everyday is also pissing me off, I WANT A SCOOP OF CHIPS. Tomorrow will be better.

W.T.F?

What is all this emo crap everyone is talking about, I figure it is some sort of music style. Have I been away from home that much? I miss one B.D.O and I'm behind the times? Fuck that LET THERE BE ROCK.

R.A.T.M

I wanna be Jackie Onassis I wanna wear a pair of dark sunglasses I wanna be Jackie O Oh Oh Oh please don't die WE ARE ALREADY DEAD. http://www.stuff.co.nz/3938932a1860.html

Good ole Ridgey

Every day I look at www.stuff.co.nz to keep up with the news back home, I always liked to watch game of two halves to see what Ellis and Ridgey were up to and what I found at stuff cracks me up. No wonder he was a crappy All Black...Beckhams sloppy seconds http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/story_pages/showbiz/showbiz1.shtml#

Star Face, not quite the C&F but up there.

I think I may have found one of the coolest bars in Korea, it's called Star Face, it's in Hyundai which is in Busan and on Saturday nights it serves foreigners all they can drink for $N.Z15. For some reason your not allowed rum or Jack Daniels but as I'm neither a Pirate or a god dam fake whisky drinker I couldn't have cared less. I was a wee bit wobbly when I got there and ended up on G&T's all night, Man did they go down. The place had a pool table (very rare in Korea) where I'm proud to announce not one Australian beat me, a few Canadians did but no Ockers, a dart board (almost unheard of), where everyone at the Cat & Fiddle knows I'm an easy beat but that didn't stop me 1 iota and one of the best pub vibes I have ever come across. It has a reputation as a foreigners hang out which is kinda cool cause it means that the locals realise this and those that can and want to talk to Wiguks (That's me) go in and get boozed. It's really interesting talking to Koreans who are fluent in English there lives are so different from a Kiwi's, they are all about beating the competition (By that I mean competing hard out for jobs, apartments and education) they are all curious about westerners and want to know the most personal stuff, I tell em whatever they want to know cause I figure I'm not gonna see them again in a city of 4million that I don't even live in. Believe me, New Zealand is coming out as all good! I stayed the night in a Motel in Hyundai, around here some motels have a reputation and are known locally as Love Motels, as you can imagine they are cheap as chips and discreet! So no one blinked an eye when a Kiwi bloke, an English chick and an Irish chick wanted to share the same room for the night. I know what your all thinking and no. $40 between three ain't bad. It was a traditional Korean room which meant no beds! over here alot of people sleep on padded mattress, kind of like a thick heavy quilt. When your boozed you don't care! The locals I was talking to said it is not uncommon for Husbands and Wives to saunter there way through the doors as generations of families live not only under the same roof but in the same rooms(Bugger all space over here) and want a shag in private! The Friday before I did the usual, went to the local, got drunk, shot the shit, went to another bar with a live band from Thailand of all places, then off to a Noriban where I pulled out some atrocious but highly entertaining (Yeah Right) Oasis, Queen and The Killers. Home by 7 up by 2 and in Hyundai by 4 to start all over again. As Pa Beagle would say "It was very pleasant" This week so far has been uneventful, work, home, sleep, work etc, got some of the schools Big Wigs coming on Friday and got told to wear a suit. I'll keep you posted.

Gambling is life.

Can somebody please put a half box on Darci B, Gee I Jane and The Silence Sir in the Telegraph at Trentham on Sat. Chur.

Crazy aspects of Korea: The Rooster's View.

I've been here a wee while now and I have seen some weird shit that just would not happen in New Zealand.

1) The cops here put up with a lot of shit. I know Kiwi cops do as well but last week I saw a cop car pull up a scooter, the guy on the scooter was obviously drunk (as was I) so I thought I would sift on over and investigate. I wish I could of understood the words being said but I definitely knew the body language. The Copper got him off the bike, the derro started yelling, stuck his fingers down his throat and threw up on the cops shoes, as the cop bent over he got a knee to his kisser, the derro leapt on his bike and scooted off!

2) It is considered very normal and natural behaviour for guys to show friendship by holding hands.

3) Males can smoke any where they want, it is very frowned upon for a women to smoke in public. When the Korean chicks are on the juice in a bar they will smoke in the toilet, just like school girls. This leads to massive queues outside the ladies. Foreign chicks hate this, the number of times I have stood guard outside the men's while my chick mates are doing their thing, well I need more fingers and toes. It is hilarious trying to bounce Korean men out of the men's when they are drunk with a full bladder!

4) They have got a Korean fast food chain over here called Lotteria. Last week I had an Octopus burger, if you think thats not cricket the bun was made out of rice glued together!

5) It is nearly impossible to buy a drink of spirits without having to purchase the whole bottle. I don't really have a problem with this one, Johnnie Black bottles go for around 40 pesos.

6) Korean men do not have arm hair, my students have finally gotten over the fact that I do and no longer pull it. Maybe it was the clips around the ears that did it, I'm not exactly sure...

7) Say a bad word about a certain English soccer player with a very similar christian name to me and the girls here start crying. Ugly fucker is not in the Korean vocabulary.

8) Do not let the kids drink coffee in your classroom. Green Tea is fine.

9) Korean food is not called Korean food, it is just food.

10) Spitting is everywhere, and not just the spit out ya saliva but hoiking out your lungs, any where or everywhere, anytime is acceptable. I decided to try this one out for myself. Korean men with a little bit of English will often come up and talk to you. I have discovered a common bonding ritual is a good old lurgy, followed by a smoke.

11) Only one person pays the bill, this is a huge matter of honour to them. It always falls on the oldest male. So Dad please feel free to visit. If you invite someone out for a meal this line can be a bit blurred depending on how well you know each other, or in my case how big the tab is. When I go out with foreigners we don't participate in this charade, if we leave we put money on the table and walk out. Twice I have been the last guy there and both times I have made a profit, free drinks all night and a couple of bucks in the skyrocket. Karma will one day get me and I will lose out big time. Earl taught me that.

I'm sure I'll think of more and I will write another post on this subject.

I just got Paid!

I just got my first pay check! I'm a millionaire! I'm off to the pub, I may be some time.

I spent the weekend in Jinju with an Irish chick and an English chick. Jinju is about and hour and a half away by bus. I didn't do any tourist shit, just got there, walked around the market then headed straight to a German pub where we played cards for hours, I learnt some cool new games, in particular a gambling one called New Market, after the race course. It involves two bets, a dummy hand, gambling and the obligatory drinking. It's pure luck with no skill involved, you can only lose out if the cards you need are in the dummy hand. Dad, before you say anything I lost about 90 cents.

While we were there a bunch of Koreans at the next table bought us food! It seems everywhere I go I get looked after. I can bowl on up to any local and with a lot of miming, pointing, smiling and my very few Korean words get what I need. They bend over backwards to help you. On Saturday we were trying to find a bar we got told about called Devil, we stopped a guy, he did not know but went into the nearest shop, they didn't know so they checked out the Internet for us. This all took about 10 minutes and I was thinking to myself would I do that for A Korean back home? I kind of doubt it but now I definitely would take the time to help out foreigners.

We only got kicked out of one bar this weekend, it was because we were too loud! Loud in a bar I hear you say, picture a drunk Irish chick, a smashed English chick and this Kiwi who likes a few too many, gambling over cards, everyone yelling, drinking and taking the piss out of each others accents and you might get the idea. After that place we eventually got to The Devil Bar which was much more amenable to our antics. We all walked in, spied some Wiguks (Foreigners) promptly became mates and taught them how to play New Market and started gambling again. The bar tenders at this place, two Koreans around 20ish started talking to us and it turned out that they were magicians! For hours they showed us tricks, some of them were totally brilliant. They were putting one ball in my hand clicking their fingers and there were two sitting in my hand. I know I was drunk but I was flabbergasted.

I didn't get up till three in the arvo on Sunday, this place is crazy and I'm loving it.